SimonHarlingBlog Posts

If you are a cog in a machine, you are replaceable; there are many more cogs than there are machines. If you are a linchpin, you are critical to the success of a process, and without a linchpin, the machine doesn’t function quite the way it could. A linchpin possesses creativity, problem-solving, and emotional labour, and is much more likely to take a systems view.

Are grassroots coaches “cogs” or “linchpins”?

A coach is asked to scope, co-create, and deliver learning experiences.

A coach is expected to be the bridge to parents, connecting them to the club’s values, expectations for player behaviours, and a moderator of sideline support.

A coach is an impresario; they organise the orchestra.

Yet, ask a grassroots coach if they are part of a wider “workforce,” and they are unlikely to know what you are talking about – much like a cog in a machine that focuses on its specific function.

Yet, many grassroots coaches quit once their child has moved through the age groups or quits the sport.

Yet, grassroots coaches are trained in the art of war – the tactical and technical elements of sport – not the war of art.

And my point?

If you have a linchpin in your organisation (my guess is that you have many more than you think), wouldn’t you ask them to contribute to the culture of the club or organisation, instead of sending out coach developers to fix the problem of “churn?”

People who can scope, co-create, and deliver learning experiences don’t grow on trees, but they do grow in a culture that knows the difference between a cog and a linchpin.

In the gap between curious and committed lies a question:

What would have to be true for you to commit fully to this process?

Today, I learned about the importance of writing down ideas and revisiting them through the lens of the evolution of ideas.

Having encouraged my kids to write down their ideas at the start of the year, only to see them still stationary, it’s tempting to use them as a stick to beat them with.

The evolution of ideas suggests that it’s not you who is useless or lazy, but rather that the idea you came up with is not very good.

Write down your idea. “I want to save £60” is a start.

Use the difficulty. “What did you discover?” “What did you learn?”

Evolve your idea. “What do you want to change?”

And so it goes on, asking questions to build a clearer picture of what it’s going to take.

What struck me in this process with my kids was the importance of encouraging my kids not only to voice their ideas but to find a way to hold them to those ideas to find a better way forward.

Daring to dream starts with caring to ask: How are you getting on?

It’s hard to imagine the use of the masculine and feminine verbs in French if you’ve never met anyone from France. And algebra? It won’t really click if you’re still counting on your fingers.

Getting to know the person you’re teaching or coaching helps. It helps because you can apply what you’re teaching to their world. It still amazes me to see Strength and Conditioning coaches ignore the person in front of them and begin a crash course in pseudo-elite training.

Here’s a starting point to help you connect with your players or clients. Feel free to insert your sport or activity in the gaps:

What is [Your Sport/Domain] to you?

What do you do for fun?

Write a story about your life that includes answers to the following questions:

• As a [Your Sport/Domain] player, how do you learn best?

• Tell me a significant story about [Your Sport/Domain] from your life

• Tell me about someone who supported you and helped you to learn about [Your Sport/Domain].

Showing an interest in the person you are teaching or coaching is good practice, saying “I’ll never use that!”, not so much.

Partnerships don’t work because we are the same; they work because we figured out how to get the best out of each other. Trying to compete with or change someone in the end is futile; changing yourself, not so much.

.. and you… go left.

Not because that’s the alternative way to go, but because you’re asking a different question, and for that to happen, you need to be looking in a different direction.

If your competition focuses on the next sale, can you afford to focus on how you build trust instead? Selling more in the long run might be better than selling more this month.

It’s not as crazy as it sounds since it’s far cheaper to retain a customer than it is to attract one, and even easier to sell to someone who trusts you.

Repeat business is better than new business; act accordingly.

To find what you need, start by acknowledging what you want.

To help design a practice session or a coaching practice, consider these two questions:

What do you want your practice to look like?

What do you want your practice to feel like?

For example, if you aim for a playful practice, you can directly ask your players: “What does a playful practice look like?” and “What does a playful practice feel like?”

A recent study of coaching practice in youth football showed that coaches spent over 20% of practice time in transition, talking about what to do next or what had just happened.”

Once the purpose is clear, design accordingly.

Two of the kids I worked with for a number of years have had a stellar week. Darcy Harry won her first European Golf Tour Event, and Joel Makin had his first win on the Professional Squash Association Tour.

Darcy was following in the footsteps of her talented older brother, Tim. Joel lacked the technical abilities of his peer group. Both were underdogs, neither fancied as professional athletes, and yet here we are.

I built Elite Fitness on the idea of elite performance and winning, after all, the tagline in bold across a wall in the gym was:

“It’s not the taking part that counts.”

But, now what I wish it said:

“Don’t look for success, look for commitment.”

Most grassroots coaches only have one hour a week of coaching contact time. That’s one hour to deliver a sports-specific coaching session, plus maybe a game on the weekend.

There isn’t much time to play around. It might be the only time a child gets to kick, hit, or throw a ball, for example. If you’re a netball coach, you don’t want your players kicking a ball or skateboarding; you want them playing netball.

In isolation, it makes sense. But in terms of athletic development, not so much, and when considering human connection, maybe no sense at all.

How we use our time is a story, and it’s a story worth talking about.

Here’s a conversation starter, provided we remember that the word audit comes from the Latin word “audire,” which means “to hear,” not judge.

When two seemingly sensible ideas collide, and either side looks as good as the other, you may have a paradox. Take the Athletic Entrepreneur, whose clients would spend more time taking care of themselves, if only they didn’t need to work.

Balance is elusive.

The power is not in trying to solve or ignore it, since each day could bring a new answer; so choose, for now, and perhaps enjoy the fact that you have a choice.

“Can you get on the ball?” ” Can you make space?” You get the idea.

Rather than tell someone exactly where to go, you offer a challenge. “Can you win the ball back?” It’s a checking question on the player’s capability, a reality check for the current situation or perceived limitations.

“What if”, on the other hand, expands the possibilities. “What if you got on the ball?” ” What if you changed where you receive the ball?”

You might not think you can get on the ball now, but what if you could explore what you think is possible?

Tx to Harvard Project Zero

You might believe something, even justify it, yet it’s not a fact, however hard you argue. Luck plays its part. Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

How do you know if the project you are pursuing is not a siren’s call? A waste of time, or a flight of fancy, even a sunk cost. A blundering, plundering wreck.

It’s easy – are you answering the call of someone else, a siren? Or are you honouring your time?

Doubt is attractive. So to the future.

Dear future self, I’m putting myself where I will learn to facilitate gatherings, support other people through coaching, and express my ideas.

It’s not mantras, affirmations, or even journaling; it’s action. It’s not what you say you do, but what you actually stand for.

If it’s not already, it will soon be preseason training for many professional football clubs. The first few days are taken up by people with clipboards, taking notes, and comparing data. And the purpose of all this? Baseline measurements.

In between four to six weeks of preseason training, we can expect players to increase their performance from baseline by around 10%. Of course, for some it will be more, and others less, but you get the idea: it helps to know where you began.

And yet, football is a people’s game. Data helps, but it can’t kick a ball for you.

If we were to design pre-season with the connection and collaboration of the individual player and squad in mind, I doubt we would design it like we do now. The first interaction a fitness coach could have with a new player could be with data in mind and a clipboard in hand.

When gathering people on purpose, nothing kills the party like a clipboard.

On a client recruitment drive, do you pick the clients, or do they choose you?

Traditionally, wedding fayres are a chance for vendors to be chosen. Prospective providers pay to meet potential clients, and the fee often reflects the status of the venue and the event. It’s a transactional model.

But what if you could pick who you work with?

Imagine an alternative wedding fayre where you don’t invite the couples planning their wedding. Instead, you invite the trades that help make the wedding happen. 

A wedding dress designer needs stunning portfolio photos of her wedding dresses. A makeup artist needs to showcase their work in context. Venues and photographers also need high-quality imagery that highlights their expertise. So, why not invite a few models and produce the work that you all need – high-quality photos of the work that you can do?

A makeup artist might love how a photographer captured their work. A wedding dress designer could build a great rapport with a venue, potentially leading to a spot on their preferred vendor list. What started as a need for professional portfolios to attract clients ends with collaboration to produce an end product that the client desires.

You could wait to get picked, or you could pick the conditions you need to do your best work.

When making a presentation, it’s tempting to tell people what you know. If it’s a workshop, perhaps you can show them what you know.

What would change if you started with what you want the person receiving the information to do differently?

Grassroots coaches are a disconnected bunch; even coaches within the same club rarely know each other. That’s a good reason to start something like Coach Camp. However, its purpose is to change how coaches interact with each other.

Telling or showing people what you know is not enough; once you have a purpose, you can design for it, and that can change what you do.

To take a day off and know you will return tomorrow.

To complete the project and ignore the doubters, both inside and out.

Not to control the outcome, just the conditions you can control.

To do the things you said you would.

If you don’t, perhaps it’s a good place to start.

As a young sports scientist working in football, I often felt like the odd one out. I lost count of the times my manager would pass me in the corridor as if I weren’t there, seemingly picking and choosing when to acknowledge me. If it’s true that diversity often precedes inclusion, then it pays to start with the end in mind.

Green for go, red for stop. But what about amber? “Maybe”? In reality, it’s simply a signal that conditions are shifting from favorable (green) to unfavorable (red).

Today, I finally pushed a project forward that had been on red for a long time. It got me thinking about when we decide we are good to go. Are we waiting for the absolutely perfect moment, or just when it’s “good enough”? And if it’s “good enough,” what does that truly mean, because it’s not amber; it’s still undeniably green.

Green means go, and when you do, it’s time to put your foot down!

Here’s a brilliant example of what being an impresario looks like:

You find someone who hasn’t thought of doing the thing you want to do, facilitate it for them, and then you work with them to delight the audience.

The writer Steven Pressfield hadn’t thought to teach writing. I mean, why would you, if you’re busy with your craft? But Roda Ahmed saw what no one else did: an opportunity to gather people for a reason—to overcome resistance and write. Steve knows all about that.

Okay, you have to focus on the details, logistics, and where to put things, but not before you figure out what to do with the people. That’s the magic.

Everyone has a story, and therefore, a book within them, if they can get their story out. But what will you use it for? A chance to tell your story so people know who you are, or a lens through which the reader can look?

Perhaps now, you don’t need to worry about the attention it may bring (good or bad), but rather the understanding you can offer.

In the triple jump, the stages are clear: hop, skip, and jump. For the high jump, they are: approach, takeoff, and clearing the bar.

The job of a coach is to support their athlete in jumping the furthest or highest. And while we would like to think that the outcome drives the process, is that what really happens? If we are a coach who feels comfortable coaching the approach but not the takeoff, what happens then?

We might like to think we compete with other coaches, when in truth, we compete with ourselves.

Let’s change the narrative.

Join us at Coach Camp, where we affirm and challenge each other to do better. I hope to see you there. The next event is Saturday, 31st May at Sport Wales, you can get your FREE ticket here.

An impresario will start with the end in mind.

A facilitator starts with what’s on your mind.

One orchestrates a discussion, the other organises the orchestra.

If it’s an Orchestra you want, then find yourself an impresario.

If we treat learning as a “comprehension test” where an expert invariably gives out information, and then we spit back out the bits we understood, liked, or assumed we need to know, then “I need more information” is worthwhile feedback.

What would you like more of?

Of course, we could always try inspiring people to look to write their own story.

When Mike Matheny wrote the Matheny Manifesto, he was deciding the spec, just like Pete Carroll with his “Win Forever” approach.

You might look at both the names and think: “Who am I to write a coaching manifesto?” Well, who are you not to write a coaching manifesto? After all, if you don’t decide the spec, who will?

If you have ever read a book, eager to get to the end or the exciting bit, you will know how hard it can be to be present and focus on the now, the thing that needs your attention, not the thing that is pulling you along.

I felt this morning in yoga, and again while reading through the final few pages of the book, I’m trying to get out the door.

I’m not sure it’s even about seeing the finish line, just the appreciation of what it takes to stay the distance and allow yourself to do the work that needs your attention.

Or more accurately, a source of ignition. Of course, having a flame is never enough; you need fuel and oxygen.

The initial, energetic declaration of a coaching manifesto sparks interest, yet the grounded principles of a coaching philosophy are what build the practice – a place where you belong.

What experience would you like to create for yourself? 

List the skills that would make your work more effective.

If you were riding bikes before the 1980s, they were likely steel frames; anytime after, it’s a choice. It could be the flexibility in the frame, the look, or perhaps the way it makes you feel. Whatever it is, a steel frame bike has inherent value.

Inherent value: something other than market value. ‘We’re not trying to make the most bikes, we’re trying to make the best bikes.’

When you change what you pay attention to, you change what you do.

It’s a resilient industry because of the choices that are made, and one of those is to work in a shed, not a factory.

Thanks to Chris Anderson, aggregates have long been a topic of discussion. They bring together disparate ideas, offerings, and pieces of information into a single, unified platform or service. Aggregates simplify access, streamline choice, and often normalise service levels.

Many industries have considered service directories and accreditation as the answer to aggregation. But that’s missing the point -that’s more about trying to unify the thinking, not the offer.

When the sum of the parts is greater than the whole, you have aggregation; a way of creating a new, unified experience that offers value that wasn’t there before.

If we are serious about coach development, accreditation may not be as important as aggregation.

A key element of cooperative learning is forming an opinion.

Think – Pair – Share.

Whilst comparing notes is important, having your own opinion, and not just one you heard, might be the way to go.

There’s the positive stuff – do more; the negative – do less; and the downright confusing – are we even talking about the same thing?

For example, if you design a discovery experience and the feedback asks for more information upfront, then it’s not more or less feedback you need; it’s clearer communication of who it is for and what it is for.

You don’t need to hear from someone who is rowing north to see the penguins when you are rowing south.

I heard a reporter ask Rob McElhenney, co-owner of the newly promoted Wrexham FC, this question:

“Realistically, what are your dreams?”

Yes, it’s an oxymoron, but it’s also a reminder – “Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible,” a saying attributed to Saint Francis of Assisi.

If you’re not sure what the next step towards your dream is, try sorting what you think you need to do into three piles: necessary, possible, and impossible. Then, go from there.

Three questions to get your story straight:

What signal do you want to send about how you see yourself?

What message do others believe about your service?

How can your prices reflect this?

For example, if you are an author who wants to sell books and build an audience, it could make sense to scale the value of your time exponentially based on the number of people you are interacting with and the connection you are creating.

A book costs £10

A talk at a conference £100

A day of consulting £10,000

What’s your story?

“Amateurs worry about equipment, professionals worry about money,
masters worry about light. I just make pictures…”Vernon Trent

This quote by Vernon Trent makes me think about the information we use to make the decisions we take. For all the constraints and the status, the master sees the opportunity and acts.

Where’s the opportunity?

The job of a label is to carry a message.

The problem comes when the label is not clear, and the message is misunderstood. 

Mentor, coach, teacher, manager, guide by the side, sage on the stage, and my favourite, knowledge sherpa, are all labels.

The trap is to waste time on the label and ignore the real work of improving the message.  

How do we want to be ‘together” is a great place to start.

It’s said that the Twix brothers fell out and went their separate ways, only to produce the left and the right Twix bar, the combined result of which is the bar we know today.

I wonder how many sports franchises and sporting national governing bodies are trying to get kids into sports, and yet don’t talk to each other.

Play Netball connects individuals who want to play netball to teams and leagues in the local area. A staggering 66% of players have come to Play Netball as individuals, not as part of a team or friendship group, with 35,000 players registered in 150 locations across the UK.

I’m not sure I need to say anything else, other than if you are the left hand, it pays to know what the right hand is doing.

If you need a place to talk about what you are working on now, Coach Camp could be the place for you.

Last week, I dropped the term “age performance” into my email newsletter group (496 subscribers) and asked the group if it was something they were interested in.

81% opened the email.

1% clicked on the link.

0.002% responded to the poll.

If this were you, would you:

1. Accept the group narrative?
2. Or dig deeper for those who responded?

I think it’s fair to say that, as a group, we don’t care; as an individual, you might. Groups will create a narrative that suits the group’s needs, and individuals have to deal with the facts of reality. And this is where it gets interesting, because there is an argument for designing a business/service for those motivated to take action, even if it is the 0.002%.

Most, I feel, would switch and try to find something that more people are interested in.

As coaches, it’s our job to ask: Where do I want to direct attention?

How did you get on with the exercise described in the video?

Coaches suffer from overwhelm, just like anyone else. We try to focus on what our coaching is for, but the ‘busy’ takes over: writing sessions, keeping people happy, promoting what we do.

This is why Coach Camp exists. It’s about directing your attention towards your coaching, even if it’s for a short time – a place to reclaim that focus.

If we want to improve the quality of our decisions, being selective about the information we use is critical. In practice, that’s hard; it’s easy to focus on doing the things we have always done, but when you do that, you don’t have much room for anything else. 

Join us on the last Saturday of every month. It’s a chance to step away from the noise, refocus, and connect with why you became a coach in the first place.

I hope you can join us: https://simonharling.blog/coach-camp/

The summer can be difficult for coaches who work in winter sports like rugby and football. Do you continue through the summer, or encourage an off-season of sports sampling?

Specialisation in one sport offers the potential for mastery, while sampling others provides a diverse range of often transferable physical skills. The question is: can either, or both, paths lead to the same destination—high-level sports performance?

The outside view: a term used to describe taking a perspective other than your own, is worth considering. As coaches, our experiences are not unique, and we are subject to predictable patterns and biases. Perhaps the same challenge the athletes we coach face. Wouldn’t you agree?

If you’ve ever clicked your fingers while you count to 50, you’ll know it’s pretty straightforward. Each time you click your fingers, incrementally increase the number until you reach 50. The quicker you click your fingers, the quicker you get to 50.

But what else was happening around you? Did you notice you got an email? Was that a knock at the door? You get the idea – the task at hand took your attention away from your surroundings.

Now, try clicking your fingers, and alternating between counting up to 50 and reciting the letters of the alphabet; For example, 1, A, 2, B, and so on. How did you get on?

Cognitive load suggests you’d be doing well to get past G.

Before you add to the task, it pays to find out where your attention is currently.

Praise indeed! Or, Empty words? Two different sides of the same coin. My definition of success versus yours.

What are you working on? might be better.

Catch up? Clear out? Calls?

Work on creating my book, get out onto the trails, and connect with the family over food.

Tomorrow for me is Book, Bike, and BBQ – the things I love.

I’ll be working on my book, hitting the trails, and connecting with family over food.

What’s your day for?

It’s helpful to be around people who are doing the thing you’re trying to do.

Here I am, wrestling with a 3-minute skit for Coach Camp, while my daughter, 20 miles away, is warming up to perform on stage for hundreds.

Get it done, get out the door, and enjoy the rest of the day with family.

A space where adults can act like children, and children are asked to act like adults.

The answer that opens the door of possibility is “Who’s there?”

If you are wondering why things are a little predictable around here, it pays to check your answer.

I’m busy! What do you want? Come back later! – These responses keep the door firmly shut.

Two product design questions worth asking are:

Who is it for?

What is it for?

For coaches, three questions help define a practice:

What do I do?

Who do I do it for?

What do we do together?

If you would like a place to go where you can return with your answers month after month, perhaps you will consider Coach Camp: New Dates: Sat 26th April, and Sat 31st May.

Together is better.

Once you’ve figured out what feels urgent and how it fits into your plans, “What needs to happen now?” is a great way to wrap things up.

It reminds me of a piece of advice from Tony Robbins: never leave the scene of a decision without doing something about it.

It keeps what you are doing present and urgent. What needs to happen now?

The prompt: What are you working on now? This question works on several levels.

There is the NOW – what’s taking your attention and feels immediate.

And the YOU! – not the group, or the excuses, but you taking action.

Give it a shot.

What are you working on now? I’d love to hear. You can connect with me here.

Subscription business models are popular.

Gyms

U Tube

Coaching services

Food delivery

Aside from a predictable recurring revenue, what does it mean to subscribe?

To give consent or permission; commit to support; put oneself under obligation.

Before we focus on taking the money, it pays to be clear about what we are asking subscribers to sign up for.

If you would like a weekly newsletter on coaching, creativity, and personal growth, you can subscribe here.

When we make assertions, we are saying, “I will do X and Y will happen.” I know what you are thinking – and maybe you are right – we don’t get Y, or anything close to it. So, what’s the point of making an assertion? 

Affirmative resignation is when you realise where you are and accept it. With affirmative resignation comes self-acceptance. Self-affirmation, on the other hand, has no such check-in – if you tell yourself you are strong, capable, and a bit of legend, who’s to say otherwise? 

Assertions are a great way to check in with reality. We can be confident we know what we’re talking about when we can predict what will happen next. For all else, file it under, best guess. Nothing wrong with that, it’s a super helpful practice:

For example: If I run three times a week, then I’ll be able to run 5k in 20 minutes by the weekend.”

At the heart of action-based learning is the opportunity to learn a little bit more about the situation you find yourself in. Take a risk, put yourself on the hook, and see where you end up. If all else fails you may find you build emotional resilience.  

If you could do X, what do you want to happen as Y?

Skill acquisition coaches want us to “Ditch The Drills!” Predictable practices produce poor performances. Context is king; players don’t dribble around a cone on a Saturday afternoon.

Yet, it’s never been easier to pluck a drill from social media and put it into practice. So why is that?

There is no new audience for a coach; we coach the same small number of people each week – content is king, not context.

I’m sure the irony is not lost on you.

Arguably, the biggest change in sports skill acquisition should be on the coaches, not the players.

Growth requires interaction.

Interaction requires attention.

Attention requires participation.

We don’t need feedback forms; we need action.

And only my guess, for now at least – an assertion.

Coaches would prefer the opportunity to show what they can do, rather than be told what to do.

If this is true, then there will be no shortage of coaches taking part in Coach Camp.

Will you take the opportunity to talk about what you are working on?

Can appear, disloyal, ingratitful, and arguably self destructive.

If you can’t see the system and, worse still, your role in it, then biting the hand that feeds you is an easy and potentially expensive mistake to make.

The wonderful thing about the actor Michael Sheen, according to Stephen Fry, is that he bites the hand that feeds him.

I get the sentiment; I just don’t think it’s true.

Seeing that £100,000 can buy £1,000,000 worth of debt, Michael Sheen is using the system to solve a problem, not cause one – and that’s worth remembering becuase the doubt can feel the same. Yet, the outcome is very different.

Imagine that the thing you are working on is going to be a success – what changes? “Believe, Believe, Believe” cries Anthony Hopkins – you must believe!

What bold steps would you take if you could guarantee your success?

Would the tone of your pitch deck change?

How much will you commit now that it’s going to be a success?

Were you holding back from speaking to anyone?

You are not supposed to win, so win at everything – reverse this process for losses and know you can handle those too. Acting as if is powerful once you know you can afford it.

How strong is “strong enough” is a debate for weight rooms up and down the country. Some like their athletes stronger than others. Weak to strong goes the continuum.

In coaching, some practices have their players in lines waiting their turn, others turn their back on the chaos that ensues. Chaos to control goes the continuum.

And yet, are these really the edges that matter? Is this hill you’re willing to die on?

Before drawing lines, it pays to think about what else you could focus on.

All it takes is a little curiosity, a few wine bottles, and an unreasonable attitude.

When my kids were young, I would hang them upside down or tickle them – “again, again” was a common request.

What’s next? Feels a little harsher. Maybe even dismissive of the last effort. And that’s key because when you believe your best work is in front of you, what’s next is a reasonable jolt.

“Again, again” speaks to the part of us that wants to be recognised for what we do, but time moves on, and that’s good when we recognise our best work is in front of us, not behind us.

These past few days have felt hectic, pushing out event invites and sponsorship requests. Sitting at a desk for three hours a day writing is difficult; you have to trust yourself to do the work. This week has been about the trust other people are placing in me.

Do I say what I mean?

Do I do what I say I will do?

Do I stand up for the things I believe in, even if, especially when others don’t agree?

Building an audience might not be nearly as useful in the long run as building trust in yourself and others.

“I’ll be with you, now, in a minute.”

Today, I saw a job advert for a Coaching and Leadership Development Manager. I looked it up; it’s common business parlance. Maybe it’s just me.

Show us where you want us to go or manage our expectations; just don’t tell me now, in a minute.

What if making a plan for the best year ever was not the point? After all, we make plans, and god laughs. So, why plan?

As a family, we thought it worth the ask.

For reference, our headings are:

• Financial
• Family
• Health
• Business
• Fun/Adventure
• Contribution

Each of us wrote whatever we wanted under each heading.

Then, we used generative questions (you can see them scattered across the sheet) that the kids researched and a separate piece of paper to find links and themes between the headings. Out of that fell a plan.

You are probably already there, but it’s not actually about hoping for, wishing for, or planning the best year ever—the surface details don’t matter as much as the chance to connect to each other’s thinking, connect ideas, and learn to listen to each other. It’s a metaphor for learning to collaborate—and in turn, if we do that, just maybe, we will have the best year ever.

Five years from now, will you be paying attention to the same things you focus on now in your coaching practice? I doubt it.

What are you paying attention to NOW? Does it help you become the coach that you want to be? And if not, what will?

In The Squat Garden (Sat 5th April or Sun 6th April) is a discovery workshop for coaches who are ready to talk about where they would like to take their coaching. Where you direct your attention matters – where you look is where you go.

I hope to see you there.

It’s hard not to get frustrated when the tech doesn’t work, when things get in your way, and nothing seems to get done.

The alternative?

Know that the thing you are trying to get across the line might not be what makes your life any better – that could be relationships, your health, and happiness.

Take the reminder and run.

Getting clear on what it depends on is important.

Whatever you think it is that is holding you back, it’s worth testing.

Think it’s distribution? Join a cooperative. Think it’s time? Throw everything off your desk and start again with the most important thing. Whatever it is, “it depends” is just the start of it, not the answer.

If you are a coach who keeps going back to do the same thing – the same session, the same workshop, the same message – are you greasing the groove or wearing a groove?

In my physical training, I return not to the same spot, but often to do the same thing. I pay attention to what’s happening, and how I am that day, subtly playing with how I do things.

I’m back for more, just not the same.

You need to chop the wood.

Hiding out to practice a thing you care about – woodshedding.

Figure out what you think can contribute and bring it forward.

It’s been over 25 Years since DJ Shadow released Endtroducing; the act of finishing one thing and then starting another.

Today is a great day to go chop some wood

The more coins you put into a coin pusher the more likely it is that the penny will drop? Only, we don’t know the cost of waiting. Is the return going to be worth the investment?

If, like me, your desk reminds you of a coin pusher today, it’s worth asking:

What am I waiting for?

Prompts provide encouragement to say something. Well-designed they can help people to see where they are with a concept.

“I see myself as someone who…?”

“I see myself as someone who creates books, resources, and experiences that inform. Through this process, I learn about myself and where I fit in the world, and in doing so, others may also learn a little more about themselves and their place in it.”

Your turn.

Where do you go to practice?

Do you have a place where right and wrong are less important than showing up?

A place where people would notice if you weren’t there next week?

If not, it might be worth building one, don’t you think?

Here are two different ways to instruct the overhead squat:

External cue – placing a focus outside of the body.

• Find your ‘Y: Experiment with your grip width.
• Maintain a vertical torso
• Keep the pole directly above your mid-foot as you squat
• Descend as if you’re lowering yourself into a box

Now for internal cues – placing a focus on the body and how it feels.

• Feel the connection between your feet and the ground
• Engage your core as if bracing for a punch
• Sense the engagement of your lats supporting the pole
• Imagine your body as a single, integrated unit moving smoothly

What you pay attention to matters, language matters, and above all, what you do matters.

If you want it more than the person you are coaching, that’s a problem. It’s a problem because they can’t see what you can see, and no matter how hard you try, that won’t change. What is likely to change is the relationship.

Frustration, disappointment, and resistance all fuel the fire.

Consider youth sports; Long-Term Athletic Development developed by adults for children.

If you want it more than the person you are coaching, that says more about you than it does about them.

Hang around with writers for long enough and you will see the temptation to please the editor, the reader, or your parents is real.

I’ve noticed that as I develop copy for my book or a workshop, what changes is my commitment to the idea. What I need to say is emerging—the idea behind the action. The act of writing leaves everything else behind, including my worries and concerns about the idea.

Write for whoever you want, just don’t waste the chance to learn what you really think.

“Fail fast, fail often” is a fine idea when iteration is the focus.

However, it’s worth considering the asymmetry of risk for a moment. The upside of iteration may well be clear, but if the downsides are not reversible – much like jumping out of a plane without a parachute – it only needs to happen once.

Could you afford to “lose” an hour a day to learn a new skill? Maybe.

But, could you afford to “lose” an hour a day to a skill where you’re unsure if you are getting any better? Probably not.

Without grades, or rewards, we aren’t all going to be this brilliant – but we are going to change if we continue to face forward, and leave the past behind. 

Embracing loss is a competitive advantage. Because we are hard-wired to avoid it, doing so gives you a unique edge in whatever you choose to do.

What are you going to “waste” your time on?

I have two options, A or B, for the content I have created.

Option A: I give people the content, tell them how I made it, and have them talk about how they might use it for themselves – “Tell me what to do, and I might do it.”

Option B: I give people an experience, have them pull it apart, and then rebuild it the way they want to use it. The content I have used to create the experience may or may not be discovered based on what the participant is paying attention to – “I notice”, “I wonder,” and “What if.”

Two questions to help you decide:

What experience do you want to create for yourself?

Who do you seek to serve?

Figure that out, and the rest follows.

What then?

You could act like you do?

You could wait until you do.

Or, you could embrace that you don’t -not because that lets you off the hook (although it could) – but because then you can put away the pedestal and work from the ground up.

Loss is unavoidable. We avoid it the best we can, yet, loss as Hugh McLoed points out is upstream from change.

If you want to create change, learning to take a little loss, might just be a skill worth having.

“What do you want to talk about?” “What’s on your mind?” These are great questions when you begin a coaching session.

Of course, if you are a sports coach, focused on performance it’s less about finding the subject and more about working your way through one: “I’ve built this session, I think we can do better.”

Both are based on horizontal relationships, side to side not one above the other – the only difference is the subject.

Sports coaches find the subject that your players can tune into, and you will find your performance.

Usually paid in advance, often acts as a barrier, and always a signal – how to price your work is a tricky subject for many freelancers.

Price to build a reputation, to do it again, or never have to do it again. Free, and it could be for anyone. Expensive, and your name might not be on the list.

You could define enough and in defining enough, be secure enough to defer your payment until you demonstrate that you can create enough value for everyone.

The best way to market what you do is to do it again tomorrow.

If you are an author, write another book.

If you are a podcaster, produce another episode.

People will find you – keep doing the things that you want to be known for.

Everything else can wait for your spare time because those are the things you don’t want to be known for.

“Make every day your masterpiece” – John Wooden

Today you don’t have to accept what you chose to ignore yesterday.

Today you can take it one person at a time, one moment at a time.

Today doesn’t have to be the same as yesterday.

Making sense is not the same as sense-making. If it made sense, you would probably already be doing it. If you are not [doing it] try making sense of that.

Doing it as if your life depends on it is hard to imagine, but acting as if you are a major publisher whilst self-publishing is possible.

Putting yourself where you want to go helps you see what you need to do to get there.

What will you do differently?

You could get an MBA in leadership from a fancy college and learn all the tools and strategies of a modern leader. Nothing wrong with that. Perhaps, that has meaning to you.

What about sharing where you are with leadership currently? How would that make you feel -scared?

Acceptance of where you are now is courageous, and that’s not a bad place to lead yourself -and then others from.

Yesterday I shipped a piece on coach development.

Shipping your work can feel like an expensive firework -it seems a shame to let it off. All that hard work, the initial excitement and then it fizzles out. Everyone moves on.

But, that might be missing the point.

What does seeing things differently allow you to build?

Isn’t that the point?

Who owns the task of coach development? Is it possible that no one owns coach development? Perhaps, the various agencies, organisations, and actors all own a stake.

We can better understand who owns coach development by examining who benefits from it.

There are lots of people who benefit from the coach development industrial complex. So, here’s another question that will bring some clarity. Who pays the price if the outcome of our coach development efforts is poor? 

The owner bears both the upside and the downside. To understand why, watch the difference in the behaviour of a founder and a business expense account holder. One has skin in the game, and the other is playing the game. 

There can be only one answer: the coach – the only person with skin in the game. The rest are players. 

Of course, there are risks involved in playing the game. You might lose, or it might not work. This explains why some coaches are happy for others to play the game for them. The game is not for everyone. 

Here are some principles to distinguish coach development, where coaches ultimately own their growth, from mentoring or coach education, where other factors may play a more dominant role:  

Build horizontal relationships: If you believe your role is to “develop” another coach then you have placed yourself above the other person – that’s a vertical relationship. The coach sits beneath you. 

Far better that a coach learns to believe in what they are doing than believe that you know what you are doing. It’s a lot less risky and far less disappointing.

Coach the person, not the problem. This is coach development, not ER, we have the time to shift the focus from the problem to the person. 

Is it a real problem or the first problem? Help reconnect them to emergent realities (information, goals, emotions, intentions.) “What is ready to happen now?”

Focus on commitment, not success. I wrote the Good Coach Bad Coach Manifesto because I wanted to give myself a yardstick by which to measure my performance. the question I was trying to answer: “Under what conditions was I a bad coach or a good coach?” Pretty black and white. 

How about when I was 78% good and 22% bad? When did that happen? Worse still, I let someone else make my mind up for me. 

If you believe in the process, look for commitment, not success. What are you committed to? What do you stand for?

The coach is responsible for what they care about. Agendas are helpful for meetings, and curriculums provide frameworks in education, but in coach development – find the energy. The alternative is to play along and end up in places we don’t belong. 

The question isn’t “How do we create a better coach development strategy?” but it could be: “How do we help coaches build authority, influence, and status?” or “How do we help coaches build their practice?” or “How do we help coaches find their Elvis?”

Don’t try to herd cats, build trust. Creative tension describes the gap between where you are and where you would like to be. Why anyone would want to try to herd cats from one place to another is beyond me; perhaps it’s easier than saying “No one is listening to me!” When you are talking about people though, it’s about the relationship and more specifically the role you play in that relationship.

Show don’t tell. Here are two examples of horizontal, ownership-based approaches to coach development that focus on creating the conditions in which relationships flourish:

Accept the Offer. I created Coach Camp using the prompt “Here’s what I am working on now.” When a coach says “Here’s what I’m working on now,” they’re inviting collaboration on their terms. They own both the challenge and the direction. The response isn’t to fix or teach but to join them in their exploration. This maintains their ownership while creating space for genuine co-learning.

If you want a quick fix, Coach Camp is not it, it’s slow but important work building trust. I can tell you that if you apply the same thinking that comes with low trust, high control environments, and start head counting – Coach Camp is not for you. 

Make an Offer. Show up with something you have built – Here’s what I have built, I think we can do better.” Could be a coaching practice session, an experience, or just about anything that you are willing to see broken down.

Prof Matthias Lochmann, the German academic credited with reshaping youth football in Germany, wanted to develop his ideas. He showed up with hand clickers – the type that door security uses. All the coaches had to do was count how many times individual players touched the ball during different session designs. Was one session better than the other? 

I can’t think of a better place to end – an invitation to build together, not a presentation of a finished solution. I’ll leave you with this: You don’t have to own coach development to play your part. Just know your role.

Why lead a horse to water if it’s not going to drink?

Find the people who have done it before and are willing to do it again. That’s it.

How many handshakes will it take before I learn about what you do? Six handshakes and I get to hear about Kevin Bacon, but I’ll be honest, I have no idea what he’s up to. So, you better make it less than six.

What connects you to your next customer?

A reminder that seeing things differently opens up a world of possibilities. The world doesn’t need to be perfect or ideal. When you can see things from a new perspective, it gives you hope that change is possible.

Rhythm, showing up on time, every time you say you will might just be as important as being right. When trust, reputation, and empathy are at stake, rhythm could be the difference maker. Without rhythm, you ain’t getting to the beat.

“Give a man a reputation as an early riser, and he can sleep ’til noon.” — Mark Twain.

Reputation goes before us, changing how we see things – and that’s worth challenging.

Perhaps, a more useful question is: What do you think you see?

Is it your task as a coach to ensure everyone enjoys your session?

What about skill development is that your task as a coach too?

How about offering solutions to problems?

Participation in youth sports – is that the parent’s task?

If you want to know who owns the task ask: Who benefits?

Something new and interesting is happening and I’m curious:

“My Daily” is a worksheet in Google Drive, a place where I can go to noodle, develop my ideas, and reconnect to my strategy with no judgment.

Only when the idea has developed do I put the content where it needs to go – that’s when I decide.

It’s a way of carrying my strategy, personal statements, and threads forward in one place.

To be continued. 

Are you falling in love with the person or the feeling of being in love?

Do you love the product you’re creating or the process itself?

Will your book be best in class, or do you love the act of creating – the space and freedom it gives you?

What are you falling in love with?

Happy New Year. We are on the out of the long nights – hope springs eternal. I’ve yet to see an Easter egg, but it won’t be long. 

Chasing The Sun is a lovely film if you like bikes, long days, and giving yourself the time to do something just because. “I wonder how far I can go on my bike in a day?” wondered Olly Moore, the founder of the Chasing The Sun Race. Aside from a feel-good factor, and lots of stories about how people use bikes in their everyday lives, there is something else about this film that I love. 

Yes, Olly is curious, and idealist, but more than that he was chasing the sun whether you liked it or not. In the third year of trying to get from one end of the country to the other, no one went with Olly. Not one of his mates, was interested, bothered, not one bit. 

Fast forward a few years and now hundreds, if not thousands, of people take part in Chasing the Sun events throughout the UK, Italy, and Ireland. The event raises a stack of money for charity, people push themselves further than they have gone before, and they do it with people they have only just met. 

Olly Moore is my hero – go chase the sun this year. You might not catch it, but who gives a shit – it’s yours to chase.

A sure sign that you think you’ve “made it” is when you stop making stuff. No need for action, prototypes, or an appetite risk – you’ve made it. Or so you think.

I’ve learned that JAQing is a thing. Turns out it’s been around for a while. I never did quite understand why Socratic questions included “Questioning the question.” I do now.

What would make this question worth asking in the first place?

Failing that, the rule of two feet works every time.

Nothing drains energy away from a coach quicker than the realisation that no one is listening. The changing room is lost and compliance is at an all-time low. What to do?

Asking “How do I get people to listen?” is reasonable if the task is to get people to listen. But is that really the task of the coach? Or is it a consequence of other actions?

If the assumption is that people should care what you have to say since you are the coach and it’s not working, then flip the thinking. They don’t care what we have to say.

What changes?